I need cheese with my whine

Ok, so I am here in Cebu. The flight from Dallas to Korea started out well when I saw that the 2 seats next to me were empty, until this Vietcong from another row jumped on one of them. He wanted to give his companion his seat so his friend could lay down and he to use the 2 empty seats next to me. I expect women to be less considerate to other women but I don't expect males to do that to women. Well, he did. He immediately plopped himself occupying the 2 seats with his feet almost touching me. I wanted to whack that Vietcong but I tried to be nice. I asked him if he could tell me about train travel in Vietnam. He said: "No, you go Vietnam, ride plane. Train no good, seat smaw". Then he put on his headset. Did I say I wanted to whack that Vietcong?

Then I land in Cebu and my troubles are only beginning. The heat is killing me. And I think I caught this colds from the airplane. I wish people would cover their mouth when they cough especially in confined pressurized spaces... like the airplane? Ever since I landed I have this colds and sinus congestion and a nagging headache. With this I am struggling to enjoy my day, I can't see straight. I had all kinds of plans before I got here like, going to Vietnam and or Australia to see my cousin, but now all I want to do is get back on the plane and head back home. But where is home?

I am pretty proud and happy of this postage stamp size apartment I have here in Cebu. It's really not that small, it's bigger than that. It's about the size of a volkswagen. But don't knock it, it's better than the hostels I've stayed in and it's easier to cool. Even though I don't like the window units, it cools me just fine. Until now. I have more to complain about like this netbook I am squinting at right now but my eyes are tired therefore I don't have any energy left for my other complains.

Of Death, dementia and commitment

Every Sunday morning when I wake up, I always play praise and worship songs either on my CD player or the radio in preparation before I go to church, but this morning I happened to tune in to a station interviewing Naomi Feil, the founder of Validation Training Institute. When Naomi was asked how people prepare for dementia, she said: "Get your act together now, if you have unforgiveness towards someone, forgive. If you have unresolved issues in your life, you need to resolve it now." Of course it's not that simple, but she said that what old people say or do when they have dementia is largely related to what happened to that person when they were young.

Then I stopped by the mall on the way home from church and I saw this elderly couple holding hands, both of them looked very frail, but the wife was paralyzed on her left side with her left hand badly atrophied. The husband was gently leading her as she was walking very slow and without any expression on her face. I was deeply touched by it and I thought that's how marriage should be like. I always felt that marriage is not about love, but commitment - we don't always stay in love, but we have to stay committed. When we're younger and in love, we hold hands so we don't kill each other then when we get old, we hold hands so we don't fall. Death, dementia and commitment - hard topic but we have to address it.


Video courtesy:danemcg

Remembering When....

In 2003 Don died unexpectedly in a remote island near Cebu. I was numb, lost, confused and tired. On the second night of his wake a pack of Filipinos who were strangers to me, showed up with a young American man. He introduced himself, hugged me and asked if he could pray for me. I could never explain the comfort that his gesture brought me, I thought God must have sent him all the way from California to remind me that HE was still in control inspite of my collapsing world. Aaron sang this song, and when he sings, he doesn't sing to the crowd..he sings to the Lord. That's my friend Aaron.


Video Courtesy:alwaysforgive821

As long as I am whining...

Twelve years ago, Don finally agreed to buy me a computer after my friend in Cebu harassed me, "You live in America and you don't have a computer?" she got tired of receiving letters from me through fax. After a few days of tinkering with it, Don thought I was a computer whiz because I learned how to turn it on and off.

Computers are a blessing when they're working but right now I'm squinting at this tiny netbook fondling this ticklish touchpad because my desktop won't let me in to blogspot and my laptop's wireless card stopped blinking..meaning he ain't working either. If only my old Corona has internet.

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Of Stress and Marginless Life

Margin is having breath left at the top of the staircase, money left at the end of the month, and sanity left at the end of adolescence. Marginless is not having time to finish the book you're reading on stress, margin is having the time to read it twice -Richard A. Swinson, M.D.

As I was musing over these new gadgets I got, I started to feel stressed. I don't want to come across as being ungrateful, I am, but I feel that I have to learn to use these gadgets to it's maximum potential and my brain is too overloaded already to process new stuff. I remember the book that Dr. Swinson wrote in 1992, titled Margin - (Restoring emotional, financial and time reserves to overloaded lives.) At the time he wrote that book which was 17 years ago, I only had to stress on how to program my coffee maker to brew right after I wake up not 2 days after I awake.

There are at least 3 contemporary causes of stress : 1.The alarming increase in crime and violence makes us more afraid. 2. The rapidly changing job market, technology and the economic factor makes us more professionally insecure. 3. And because of widespread separation or divorce, we are more alone. And if I may add to that, I say that even married couples living under the same roof, feels isolated from each other because of the remote control. When you're glued to that remote, well, you end up feeling....remote.

I know you're thinking I'm crazy for stressing over things that others consider to be fun.My engineer friend who gave me all these gadgets enjoys reading manuals, I don't. Manuals stress me out, period. Especially now that my brain has cobwebs in them. I have books that are still packed in my garage and the thought that I don't have time to read what I have already unpacked stress me out. But wise man Solomon says: "Of making many books there is no end, and much study is wearisome to the flesh." So I chill, but this touchpad still drives me nuts and the thought of having to read the manual still stress me out.

Of Gadgets and more gadgets

In the early 70's when the US Congress was discussing about the emerging technology, their excitement pooled around "how much time it would save us". They were right and wrong. Yes, it freed us from doing laundry on a scrub board or from going to the river to wash, but technology also gives us more gadgets to manage thus making us more isolated. Instead of socializing with other women at the river, we now are stuck staring at our Blackberry's.

I have never bought a piece of electronic gadget unless a coffee maker is considered one. Everything I have was given to me. And because I have been complaining about my desktop and laptop, this week I received a new Netbook plus a new Canon digital camera and a Flip Mino camcorder. Don't ask me who, just know that it's a he. I am now blogging from this netbook because I could not blog on my desktop anymore, again,, don't ask me why,just believe me when I say it won't let me.

I don't read manuals except the Bible. So imagine my frustration when I have to try to figure out what to do with anything new. And now I have to learn to use the touch pad, my old laptop is an IBM (also was a gift) with that red button in the middle that you wiggle around, I was used to that. I cried in frustration the other day when I got on this netbook because everytime I touch the touch pad it was so sensitive that the screen just flashes in and out, I was so frustrated until my "donor friend" walked me through it to adjust it.

I can't afford to ramble on in my blog now because I spend more time feeling this touch pad, than thinking of what to say. I better get out of here and walk off this frustration.

Of Cats and Men

It's so frustrating when your knowledge of computers is very minimal. For a while I could not sign in to my blog, then I realized it's my desktop that was the problem, not blogspot.

John and Chat are vacationing in the Dominican Republic for a week and of course I'm stuck with the grandkat. I can't use a foul adjective before Tigger's name anymore because this cat has not only ruled mine and Chat's life, he has become my life. I now understand why my single friends keeps coaxing me into getting an animal for company. "It will change your life, they are better than men because they won't hurt you and they love you unconditionally." Oh yeah?

Chat's paying me more than what I make a week at my job as long as "you sleep in our house at night because I don't want Tigger sleeping alone." Whoa? that's like asking me -would I go to the Greek isles if she buys me a first class ticket. I don't like sleeping at other peoples home, reason why I always stay at hotels when I'm vacationing because I'm quirky that way, but you bet, I was quick to say yes before she changed her mind.

I have come to love Tigger, I get sad and teary-eyed just thinking about life without Tigger but I didn't know cats are as manipulative as humans. I let Tigger manipulate me because I am paid to be manipulated - his mommy told me "he can do whatever he wants". I should not scream at him or he'll pee on me, Chat said. So when I came in last night and Tigger was dragging and tearing up her Burberry scarf, you think I'd say anything and risk being peed on?

My friends are right, animals will change your life, but I still prefer men. At least if I scream at a man, I only have to worry about him running away -not peeing on me.

Kogi Anyone?

Californians always have the coolest things,while we Texans are only remembered for Waco (We ain't coming out) Ross Valory lives there, Arnel Pineda lands there and stays there. And if any man or woman is worth knowing, you can bet he or she has at some point walked the academia halls of Stanford. Talk about movers and shakers, (and I'm not talking about earthquake either) California it is. And now there's the Kogi truck in L.A. made famous by Twitter founded by guys from San Francisco. I don't know how to Twitter but I know how to eat a Korean - food I mean.

Just Kidding

I think he still got his baby teeth but his mustache is as thick as mine. Menopause makes you do strange things alright, but this kid's definitely not menopausal.

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Video Courtesy: Scottcaps22