The many faces of my grand.

Ooops...didn't mean to show you my first born enjoying his kitty dope.

Meanwhile...at the farm shack. I will get real sleep when I die, but in the meantime I am practicing in my coffin size bed.

After several prodding, my caretaker finally listened to me and planted lots of moringa--the miracle tree we use for soup as in boiled greens.
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After 3 years, my sapote (chicos) produced this year but I was in the US so I didn't get to sample its first fruits. Nevertheless, my caretaker said they were really sweet.

The Redneck is complaining. I repeat...the Redneck is complaining. About the pollution here in Cebu and how he feels so cramped. "Island fever?" I asked. "No, your crib is too damn small". Well, this is why I don't dare call it by any other name but a "crib".  I feel cramped anywhere anyway. So yesterday, we got on the bus and head south, just for a change in scenery.  And we bought the town's famous product---a cake using fermented coconut water in place of yeast.

A long time ago, an ex told me something that stuck with me until now, he said: "I am tired of trying to make others happy. From now on, I will only seek to make myself happy, until then I am no good to anyone." (A profound statement from a shallow man, but profound nonetheless.) Here we go again about "happiness". But whatever it is I am seeking, I need it. And I need it now.

So where do I start? I will begin right here  in the center of the universe---myself. People are expecting my presence everywhere; Dallas? Canada? Malaysia? The hell with all of them. I ain't doing nothing. Because the damn Korean airlines is making my life miserable by restricting my flying date if I don't come up with more money, I'd say the hell with everything.

It's 945pm, Sunday night here in Cebu. I am bored. I am anxious. I am feeling helpless. The damn Korean airlines would not let me fly back to Dallas sooner than August 28. The reason? I didn't pay enough to be able to fly whenever I want. I paid $1972.00 US dollars and they considered it a cheap fare? They tell me I can fly on the 13th of August if I pay an additional 600 dollars.

Maybe tomorrow I will feel better, maybe tomorrow I will be able to tell myself that there's a reason for everything. But right now, I miss everything and everyone in Dallas and I just simply want to hold Kalya again. And this is what's frustrating me the most----not being able to do just that.

You took me in and made me believe that I can be all I want to be. You gave me freedom and allowed me to exercise it without fear. You made it clear that if I am willing to work I will find work and prosperity can be expected. Thank YOU AMERICA AND TO THE MEN AND WOMEN WHO CONTINUE TO FIGHT FOR WHAT AMERICA WAS FOUNDED ON. Happy 4th ya'll!!!

I am here in Cebu doing what I do best---complain about the heat and pollution. The city of Cebu is just not the place to be for any reason unless you have a job that keeps you here. Or you want to be here to torture yourself with filthy air. Ok. So I am spoiled. But why should I not be? Imagine. 3 years ago, I visited this piece of property in the same island where my farm on the hill is located. I salivated over this land, all 6 acres of it. I could not afford it then, but I was more than ecstatic to help a friend buy this land, because I never dreamed of being able to afford it myself. But as of today, the land is mine, paid for and conveyed in my name.

  

Am I bragging? You bet I am. I am bragging about God! God used 2 people to help me buy this land. I have about a 1000 feet of water frontage and this is how the water looks like.

But because I can't swim, I just dip my feet in the shallow part of the lagoon.

Life has become more complicated and stable at the same time. I never liked the word "happy" being used to describe a persons state of mind, because I feel that the word is very shallow and fleeting. I prefer to use the word "content". And finally, I am. Content.  My girls.

There is a God out there.

On the drive to the airport for my flight back to Dallas, my son in-law kept saying that I should consider living in Canada. I said, "I can, but not in the same house. Find me a place I can rent, I don't care if it's a 4x4 shed as long as I live alone, because I am weird that way." So now he is bent on building me a shed at the back of their house. Chat said: "We'd be like Amish and shit....but he is bent on keeping you here." In between this tree and the frozen lake? I guess it's time to practice being an Amish Eskimo.