The Myth of the Greener Grass

The last several weeks I have been tasked to lead our Sunday Womens Fellowship. After church, we meet for lunch at one of the ladies' home and discuss the mornings' preaching and also discuss our week-which is mostly about work issues and marriage issues (to those who are married). Then we look to the bible to help guide us on how to handle our issues. The women can really get inspired and animated in the telling of their stories. (While I, only get animated when I see that one of the ladies brought my favorite dish.) The recurring thread with the married women is "I am unhappy with my husband," and the recurring thread with the work issues is that "I have problems with my co-worker." These are real issues and I understand that you can't deny other people's reality; you can only build on it. But I also know that we all have this illusion of the "grass is greener on the other side" and misconception about "happiness." I came across an old letter sent to Ann Landers, I thought it's appropriate to share and learn from.

I would like to share my story because I know that a lot of people think of their lives the way I thought of mine. Sometimes you feel lonely and unloved in a marriage, even after 23 years. You feel as if there has got to be more to life, so you set out to find someone who can make you happy. You believe that you have found someone and decide he is exactly what you want . So you pack up and say goodbye to that 23-year marriage and all the friends you made when you were part of a couple.
You give your children the option of coming with you or staying with their father. You live the glorious life for a few years and then a light bulb goes on in your head. You realize that you have exactly the life that you had before - the only difference is that you've lost your friends, your children's respect and best friend you loved and shared everything with for 23 years. And you miss him. You realize that love does not just happen; it must be nurtured through the years.
You can not undo what has been done, so you settle for a lonely and loveless life with emptiness in your heart. Ann, please print my letter so others will not give up something that is truly precious and let them know that they won't know how precious it is until they have thrown it away.
Heavy-Hearted in Philly