When I Grow Up....

I don't apologize for not knowing what I want. As I have mentioned before, choices depresses me. Having to make a decision depresses me. And having to pick what best quality to look for in a man stomps me. "What are you looking for in a man?" Someone asked me the other day. "Well, to begin with, we have not established that I am looking for a man." I said.

While Karen and I were walking at the beach this morning, my eyes landed on one of the condominium units above the shops by the marina. They're priced starting at 400,000 US dollars. "It's established that I can't afford any of these condominiums." I told Karen. "I would love to own one of these, but the only way I could have them is to marry into them."
When I think of remarrying, varied and conflicting thoughts come to mind. I would like to have someone special but I worry about having to compromise my time, my solitude or my whole being -because that's what marriage is all about. It's a compromise, a commitment; the two becoming one. Yes, the two becoming one.

My battle cry is still the same.....I want the pitter patter. Do you remember how you felt at 17? Or was it 13. That's what I'm looking for. If a man comes along and naturally makes me feel that way again, I will be the one kneeling down and proposing to him. And I won't care even if he's a millionaire.