Men or boys

When I told Chat that I'm "talking" to someone, (term used by giddy high school kids and graduate students with daddy issues) she said: "So what disease does this man have, since you always like them old and hospice bound?" "He's younger than you, he's very healthy" "Mom, then that means he's got the 'no money illness' because you just don't pick the normal ones." I wish Chat doesn't know me that well.

Several years back, right after my husband died, I was having lunch with a friend of mine who was at the time 55 years old and never been married. He said: "I envy you because you are never without a man, while I could never find a woman." I was surprised by his observation because I was oblivious to that  fact of my life.  I had to think it through and let his statement sink in. Then I realized that he was right. Ever since I could remember, even in my early childhood, I always surrounded myself with men; I preferred the company of my older brothers and their friends over my sister. When  I married at 17 my husband then became the only source and focus of my existence. (I was suffocating him, he said, and made him swore off women. For a few weeks anyway.)  To this day, whenever I come into emotional or relationship difficulties, I am never comforted unless I tell a male friend--first.  I have great female friends, but the comfort and solace they give me is nothing compared to when a male friend tells me: "Enough of that crying shit already, go kick some ass."

Men handle things differently; they won't let you brood over a broken heart, they don't have the vocabulary for that to communicate. They can go on and on about their reconditioned Harley, or why they prefer tits over legs, but affairs of the heart? There's Bud or Jim Beam for that.

I'm losing my point here, oh, yes, Chat said if I get serious with this "boy" she's going to put me in a nursing home. "I will declare you incapable and I will send the boy home, by boat." "He's European, his exchange rate is higher than my US dollar." I tried to bargain. "Then he can pay for his own boat fare." I think she means no way I can have fun.